We're a team

I never really write posts about how awesome my husband is, I actually don't write about him a lot at all.  I am just feeling overwhelmed with all of the blessings in my life, my husband, my kids, our situation, I just have to let it out! 

Just to prefeace this post.  We are not perfect, we fight.  We get angry.  Sometimes we go to bed mad, sometimes we leave the house mad.  But at the end of the day, we are still best friends and we both know that the other one always comes first.  I don't at all want to come across like my life is perfect, or even close.  I have a messy house (sorry Ashley!), I am sometimes (probably more often than not) a ditz (just lost my wallet, ugh).  I sometimes say things to my husband that I shouldn't (sorry babe, working on it!), and my kids aren't always great.  Working on that too! 

Anyway, I feel overwhelmed with God's goodness today and thought I would share.  I love my boys. They are strong and healthy and loving and funny.  Such a blessing even when I am hairbrained and not the nicest mother.  I love my husband.  God made him for me.  (I mostly know that because no one really knows how to handle me...)  He is a good strong man.  He gives me freedom, as much as I need within our financial boundries.  He doesn't stiffle me but keeps me in control.  When I have a million ideas of what I want to do in life, like one day be an astronaut and the next a hair stylist (little exaggerated, but kinda not, hehe).  He keeps me grounded.  He is my reality. 

We are a team together.  Sometimes I feel a little bad because I am not the perfect wife.  I don't handle all of the household duties by myself.  My house isn't always clean and I ask him to do the dishes every once in a while.  Then I realize, I am not a martyr.  He is my partner, not my master.  And granted, I know most of the house responsibilities fall on me, for better or worse, but he is happy to help.  He tells me that my sanity (occasionally touch and go) is more important than a perfect house or dishes done.  Today he wasn't feeling well, but I was also exhausted, Eli is cutting teeth again, I got Tae off to school, he has Eli at home.  Then we both took a nap.  He got up with Eli and got Tae from school.  He made Tae lunch as I made Lavar breakfast.  It was such a team effort to get through this morning.  I just love that. 

Anyway, that is about enough.  No one will ever know how awesome my husband is but me, and that is okay.  I guess I just feel like sometimes I have to explain him because he is big and black and scary and some people think that the only thing he can talk about is basketball.  But he is actually really funny.And really smart.  I wish people would give him more of a chance, you might find out how cool he really is! 

Just thought I would share a bit because I am so overwhelmed with my blessings today.  Thank you Lord!

❤Happy Anniversary❤

Today makes 3 years I have been married to my wonderful husband.  I love him still, three years later.  I know, I know three years is not all that incredible, but I'm of the thought process of taking one day at a time, and I want to celebrate each year that we make it!  Marriage is hard, and I think that people should get awards for making it work.  Specially us :).  The odds have been against us in the past, two different races, cultures, etc.  But we are making it work and constantly adjusting.  

Little collage I put together of our day

Here are my thoughts today.  Most of the hard times in our marriage have been because of my expectations I have of my husband.  I expect him to pay more attention to me.  I expect him to thank me after dinner and be excited to go out and do things.  The reality is: he is different than me.  Not better or worse, but difference.  When I realized that the only person I can change in our relationship is me and that I indeed did need a little work, it helped us tremendously.  When I take a look at myself and think about how I can treat him better, how I can serve him more, and what I can do to help him achieve his goals, we are both helped.  Then in return, he wants to treat me better, listen to me more, and be better for me.  It is a win-win situation.  So that is my goal today.  If I am being honest, it is not always easy.  Sometimes I want to him to change to make me happier.  But it isn't just about me.  It is about us and making it work.  Luckily, we have a lifetime to practice!  

Here are our beautiful wedding invitations:

Custom Invitations done by The Pomegranate Basket

Tonight we will celebrate with dinner at the Cheesecake Factory (we have a gift card) and maybe a movie.  No kiddos involved!!  The last time we were at the Cheesecake Factory was on our honeymoon!  Here's to us!

Lavar Avion Simmons, I love you more today than I did three years ago.  I had no idea the adventures ahead of us, but I can't tell you how thankful I am we took it.  I can't imagine my life without you.  I am so thankful for the man that you are and the man that you are constantly working to become.  You are an excellent husband and father and I am so blessed.  I said when I married you that I would never have to worry and that I would always be taken care of.  I thought I knew it then, but I know it more today than ever.  Everything you do, you are always thinking about me and the boys first.  Some people go their whole lives without experiencing the love that we share.  Thank you baby.  I love you and look forward to many years to come. 

Happy-Sad Anniversary

Okay, so my anniversary is on Wednesday this week.  July 28th, 2007, I married the man of my dreams.  Well, that isn't necessarily true, because I didn't really have a man of my dreams.  I didn't think about getting married or weddings until I was engaged just like I didn't think about kids until I was pregnant.  So needless to say, I was a little unprepared.

Unfortunately this years anniversary comes with a tinge of sadness.  Well not just a tinge, a lot of sadness.  A month and 9 days ago I lost my cousin, Tyson Lane Larson.  He was the best of men, and I love him and miss him so much.  He was married last year, August 1st to the cutest girl and they were perfect for each other.  He was so good to her, really they had a fairytale.  They dated 7 years before they got engaged, were engaged for 1 year, and married for 10 months.  I can't imagine the pain she is going through.  I can't imagine planning on spending the rest of your life with someone and having it cut short.  I am learning to thank God everyday for the blessings in my life, my sons, my husband, my family.  I am also learning to be aware of how fragile life is and at any given moment I could loose someone else close to me.  The only place to go is to Jesus, and leaning on Him and His promises is the only answer.

So this year's anniversary is going to be low key.  Not that we really do a ton in the past, one year we went to a resort in the Bahamas for one night while visiting family, and last year we just spent one night in Santa Barbara.  This year it is dinner at the Cheesecake Factory (we have a gift certificate!) and a movie, maybe.  I am just going to be thankful this year that I have a husband and that he loves me still.

Sorry so serious.  But I have to remember Ty.  I have to talk about him, it is my therapy.  I want people to know how great he was.  I want my kids to know of him because they won't ever get to know him.  So I might be a little Debbie Downer, but it gets me through.  Thanks for listening.

Have you lost someone close to you?  How do you cope?  Do you ever feel like you shouldn't be happy, or that if I post all these happy things I am moving on with my life and that is wrong?  Like there should be some kind of mourning period.  I don't know, I am still working through everything.  Any thoughts or advice on the subject is welcome.